The totally insane Russian pyromaniac


Red Ivan




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Ability 1

Cossack Grenade Jig

Ability 2



'Red' Ivan, a former general of the Russian secret police, left the motherland after a series of disputes with his superiors, mainly regarding his questionable methods of personnel management. Not immune to the pleasures of wanton torture themselves, his secret police colleagues found even their dubious moral compasses pointing to 'depraved' in respect to Ivan's sadistic antics, and unanimously ejected him from his post and into exile.

Now Ivan has a grudge to bear against the whole world. His hatred for both the capitalist pig-dogs and for the Soviet betrayers has left Ivan's mind an ideological mess, confused in its loyalties and motivated only by blind psychosis and a lust for bloody vengeance. Ivan's disillusion with the superpowers makes him the ideal henchman - loyal to the evil cause, and with a sense of ethics even thinner than his patience. His physical presence is second to none - built like a T-34 tank and just as unstoppable, his easily stowed rocket launcher is his primary weapon.

This rocket launcher is used in any circumstance, wether he be stood in front of said target or inside a base with valuables that explode very easily. It is advisable to keep Ivan away from important rooms, such as the control or strong room. This is the origin of the less common phrase "Ivanism", where things fall victim to what they prevent, so named due to Ivan often setting fire to the fire extinguishers placed to prevent this.

He also has a slight flaw in that, like other henchmen, he has a bias against a particular task. In this case, he will only kill enemies, and cannot capture any agents that are sent on the island, claiming that "he is not a nanny".